A Girl That Blah

A big hello to the world out there. It’s been years & crazily I forgot that I even had a blog. I resorted to write because I didn’t want to curb my creativity & one of my life purposes – add value to others life through my words of wisdom lol.

Ah, well I just had a wheatgrass juice along with flax seeds. I ain’t a health freak just yet but thanks to my allergies that I started being mindful and sincere of my intake into the holy temple – my body. ( Oh, that’s me answering to your ‘ssup? & at the same time letting y’all know how good habits for health are important )

Before I jump to the main fruit, I’d like to sum up all these years in myself getting into an unknown territory whilst holding hands of angels just to realise I was in masquerade of devils, being destroyed into tiny pieces with all the war & revelations and at last, sewing all the torn pieces with Grace & love leading to hell lot of self-awareness. In short, I went through all of that shit for something so wonderful & precious – to meet myself.

Here comes the fruit – today I’d like to talk about equating our conduct & energy towards people.

Some people tend to treat the ones closest to them very gently, preciously & with utmost care. It’s like we make that segment so exclusive that only these people get to avail the benefit of my efforts, energy and gentleness. Oh, how it turns into posse ‘you can’t sit with us’ – the exclusive group exuding premium features for subscribed members only features. You may find this group emitting ‘IDC’ attitude towards the world, sometimes mocking at them & reserving their truest self & efforts from the general public. I mean, it is general public I’m talking about & not their special club gang.

While for other group of people, we find them mishandling their closed ones because they have earned them. So, their behaviour towards their close people would be that of taking them for granted, casually & blurting out whatever comes to the tongue. On the other hand, their conduct for the external world is that of a saint, gentle soul and words that of honey.

To be honest, I partly fall into both the categories owing to my mood, benefit the person is bringing and my mental state. It is super subjective, I agree.

The reason I’m talking about this today is that this little mermaid – conduct & energy towards other is so fragile yet magnificent because of the mental, emotional & physical energy it takes up. For the people toggling switch between these two categories tend to subconsciously think so much back in their head as to what to speak now, how to conduct with them & what should I look for in our conversation. I, for some reason, tend to make myself so exclusive & reserved that I want others to achieve the standard & win this undeclared competition to be in my gang. It happens because of the mental stimulation rendered into the minds of people who wants to achieve the ‘presumingly’ unattainable & treat something that precious with delicacy.

Oh yes, you should have boundaries & rules or whatever is that you want to have. However, I am shedding light on your conduct, behaviour & energy that is absolutely ONE-SIDED. You don’t have to care about the receiving end. You just have to be cautious of your conduct. As I aforementioned that having several enlisted procedural behaviour or conduct towards different segment of people is going to cost you a lot of energy & would hence, decrease your productivity & hamper mental health SUBCONSCIOUSLY.

I have different conduct for different people and to be honest, that shift from my original self to that momentarily self takes up so much energy that I often don’t feel myself. One of the other ways it deficits me is that when I’m with my two friends & they both notice differential treatment, it of course subjects me to the sensitive moment where either of them tend to feel upset or a minor shift in my demeanour makes them crazy to overthink.

I’ve been super dynamic in my conduct with my some people & they always accepted that however, now that when I witness even a minute change in their demeanour it puts me on this overthink reel – ‘did i do something bad?’, ‘are they going to leave?’ , ‘am i not so important anymore?’ , ‘are they taking me for granted?’ and what not. I wonder how would I have driven them insane. I was wondering had I been same with everyone in my conduct, I’d have been fair in giving people equal chances to be my friend & saved myself from being mentally weary and stranded. And of course, this has to do nothing with being emotionally close to certain people.

Now comes the question of the day – HOW TO EQUATE OUR ENERGY & CONDUCT TOWARDS PEOPLE?

1. It starts from knowing your Self – who you really are & what are your primary traits?

If my ponder about myself, I’m a lover. Lover of everything kind & gentle, mourner for devils and their pain, creative at my inner peak and healer by profession in spiritual realm. My primary social traits include care, support ( in all forms ) , gentleness, fun , empathy & love.

2. Second, what are your expectations when it comes to people and inter-personal relationships?

I expect harmonious, accepting, supportive, loving and most importantly relations that add meaningful value. That subjective and unique value is what makes every relation different and special. So, hold onto that value.

3. Based on the above datas, figure out what’s the kind of universal conduct you’d like to carry towards others irrespective of any situation & their value

I’d like to fundamentally adhere to deal with them with gentleness, care, support, love & enthusiasm. What’s new that I discovered in the process is that I’m not going to limit or exclusively set apart my premiums features such as only going to certain miles for helping them whilst for my people, crossing oceans. Turning the plans with general public down whilst being extremely available to my gang. My social energy has to be equal and universal because I have to be productive with my time & energy.

4. Practise that conduct

The next time I meet someone new, I should exude same primary traits which I’d for my close people. No artificial manufacturing of my conduct or texts.

5. Remember, mark a threshold for social energy & never exhaust it beyond a certain limit for anyone/ CREATING STRONG BOUNDARIES

Having strong boundaries is so vital to save you from burning out & exhausting yourself. This tip would prevent you from grilling & avoid those who cannot respect your boundaries because they are socially & mentally impaired.

Of course, some people hold dear importance in our life. However, the rescue point is to effectively manage our social energy so that we can productively look after other important things in our lives. Thus, leading to harmonious inter-personal relationships, goodwill and good mental health.